I want both lust and love

Background Song - I'm not here by Me + T

I want both lust and love...

I don't want just lust,

I feel that I am too good for that,

I don't want just love,

I feel that I am too bad for that,

I want both,

But,

For that, I must open, they say.

'Let it in.'

Rumi says;

'Break your heart, until it opens'

'Phyian, when it breaks, the light comes in.'

Blah blah blah blah

I feel too good for that.

Mark calls it entitlement.

Feeling only deserving of the good without the bad.

Perhaps...

But

What Mark also says

Is that there is suffering in entitlement.

Very much like that line;

To love is to suffer

Not to love is to suffer

There is no reprieve

I digress,

Where was I?

Oh...yes

I want both love and lust.

But they say a person who wants, rarely gets.

Because a person who wants rarely gives.

Well...fuck me.